i figured…
i am a huge fan of the onion.
they always provide the most up to date and hysterical fake news. they were doin’ it way before jon stewart (although stewart does a more proficient and more popular job).
today, the onion posted this in their online store.
those of you that may know i sport this little gem on my wrist:

and coming from an expert, i can verify this statement. owls ARE assholes. thank you for informing the people, onion. yer doing yer job right.